Tuesday Evening

for the one i haven’t met yet

It’s 8pm
And I can smell Fall blooming
Looming are the orange leaves
And everything it means
To shed the past
Shedding all that holds us back
From being able to begin
Anew
And when I drove to work this morning
With the heater on
And your playlist loud
I smiled
Feeling all of the joy in that word
Anew
As if there’s a means to an end
As if there’s an actual end that means something
An end
To the five year nap
I’m just waking up from
And it’s nice to come to
Just in time for hoodie season
Just in time to try to make sense of the reasons
I feel these things for you
I felt it in the morning brisk
In the chill of the mid-October
Early morning breeze
And in all of the gray clouds
I could see
A beginning
I could see
Anew
And I turned the volume up
And I rolled the windows down
And I let the first rain kiss my skin
And I left the heater on
I let the nostalgia of a freshly blooming Fall have me
All of me
And when I finally got to work
I couldn’t remember the drive
Only the time
And in all of this was your face
Smiling at me through the playlist that I made
Just to remind me of you

But Wait… There’s More

🫶🏼 For (you). ❤️

🫶🏼 For (you). ❤️ we'll call it our cover.Let’s give this a go, yeah?Let’s meet up somewhere neither of us knows and we can just be.Let’s buy a couple of empty postcards and draw ourselves exactly as we are.Right now.We’ll call it our cover.And we’ll hold it to the...

read more

The Delta

The Delta love is the greatest adventure.It’s cold here. But not the kind of cold that bites my skin under my hoodie, so I bear it. I grip my fingers tight together and use my breath as makeshift gloves. I have a vision of my beanie in my top left dresser drawer back...

read more

Cigarettes & Friends

Cigarettes & Friends for Drew and Joanna, East Sac magic.You ever have those nights where the sky is so fucking clear, you swear you can see people picnicking on Mars? Their full spread lunch full of tuna fish and pickles and Cooler Ranch Doritos and probably an...

read more

Boston, MA

Boston, MA when you grow up nowhere and everywhere.It’s important to know that I grew up nowhere and everywhere. We moved around so much that I didn’t even know what version of myself was most authentic until I was in my early 20s. New places came with new posters and...

read more

Wake Up

Wake Up grief is the loudest emotion.when someone diesthere is a pause in the earth's rotationas ifthe axis we all depend on forgot to keep movingas ifthe world we all inhabit forgot to set her alarm clockor maybelike the rest of uswanted to keep hitting snooze while...

read more

Dear Xavy

Dear Xavy a letter to my unborn son.Dear Xavy (Zah-vee, short for Xavier), First, I'd like to apologize.I've tried twice now to start our family line, but both times have ended in surprise heartbreak and regret.You are already supposed to be here.I am already supposed...

read more

Crazy Love

Crazy Love "it makes me righteous and it makes me whole"NOTE: Inspired by the song, Crazy Love. We’ll make love on the couchVan Morrison through the speakersThe hard cold of the floor against my kneesServing only to remind me of this momentWith herPassion doesn’t make...

read more

Let this Be Us

Let this Be Us every love story is worthy of fame.Darling, do you know we’re famous?Don’t ask me how… but why.And I’ll tell you,that I’ve got spotlights in my eye-line and a little bit of you in my rear-view.I’ve seen you before.Not your person but your promise.I’ve...

read more

Immortal Beloved

Immortal Beloved part of my book series, Netflix and Heal.It is a Thursday night, late Spring but still cold. A kind of cold that can remind you of your loneliness. Not because you forgot your hoodie and not because the friend you’re having movie night with forgot the...

read more

Commercial Break

Commercial Break A Poem for Brandon Teenawhen i was 5i knew i wanted to grow up to be a madmana wild eyed reflection of white crazy hairwhere we all drive behind time jumping wheels requiring 1.21 gigawattsto get us anywhere but by the age of 10i'd learned betteri...

read more

It Gets Better

It Gets Better not less hard, just better.At 11 years old, I believed in magic. Like I could catch falling stars in a mason jar, carry the construction of the Colosseum in my shirt pocket, paint a storm sky to life with daylight on dark thundering nights while...

read more

Letter to My Younger Self

Letter to My Younger Self everything seems easier when looking back.Dear Hot Mess, You don’t have the heart of an angel, stop acting like you do. It will only bring you pain. Nor do you have intentions anything less than angelic in nature. Stop being bothered by those...

read more

Summer and Mean It

Summer and Mean It starting over in the magic of summer months.In this newfound Summer freedomWith short sleevesAnd sun-kissed skinThe hot lips of a cloudless dayAnd I remember what it’s likeTo walk hand-in-handWith someone who smilesJust because they know youJust...

read more

Thursday Afternoon

Thursday Afternoon for the one i haven't met yetIt’s 3pmIn the overcast glow of a prolonged winterIt’s probably Spring somewhereBut not hereAnd it’s kind of perfectThe way the gray matches the painThe way the pain matches our eyesAnd we both see itAnd we both pretend...

read more

Sunday Night

Sunday Night for the one i haven't met yetIt’s 11pmAnd I can’t stop thinking about youAnd what it might be likeTo feel the weightOf your bodyHeavyIn truth and effortAtop all of my naked passionThe madness in the hungerThe absence of sense in the urgeMakes the...

read more

The Undoing of I Do

The Undoing of I Do ...but what about love?“Marriage equality also means divorce equality,” but what about love? It’s a fact that 41% of first-time marriages end in divorce. And I remember sitting on the sidelines, on the side of the stage, somebody important was...

read more

Call Cut

Call Cut just another love poem.you wear love on your sleeve the way they used toin black and white and dramatic celluloidand we kissto the sound of remixed Mozartand renovated Beethovenbut nobody really caresand wewellwe're not really listeningeitherwe're too...

read more

Hello… I Love You

Hello... I Love You. a poem for human beings.an average conversation with a stranger:"hello. I Love You." and I've got nothing else to offer but cracked ribscaged by the display of my stain-glass smilefragile but full of faiththis is Mea Poet dipped in Human...

read more

My Name is They

My Name is They what's gender anyway?When we talkWe all speak in genderFluent from the tongueAre the soft pinks of She'sAnd the militant blues of HisPronouns never had a choice My voice is a sirBigger than my courage will ever give me credit forBut I can't afford to...

read more

You Did NOT Die Today

You Did Not Die Today January 11, 2016It’s after midnight now.On January 11th, 2016. You did not die today. And I feel like a total weirdo. Sitting here by myself, sobbing uncontrollably over you. Sobbing uncontrollably over someone that I do not know. And then,...

read more